The Last Christmas with Yellow

Jose Antunes
Cat Respect
Published in
7 min readDec 26, 2022

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Seven years later history repeats itself. I had to put my companion cat Yellow to sleep, due to PKD, a terrible disease that took her from me in the space of a few months.

At 13.26 on the 26 December 2022, I put Yellow to rest. That’s the exact hour she fell asleep in my arms, a first step towards crossing the rainbow bridge. She his joining her sister, Little One, who I put to rest seven years ago, on November 17th, 2015, and Black, the cat we also sheltered at home in September 2015, who was given to a family, and that died somewhere during 2016.

So, now a cycle has ended. Yellow, my companion of many photo sessions, my “co-pawlot” in Elite Dangerous, my source of inspiration for some of my writing, my “always there by your side” friend is no more, at least not on this plane of existence. I hope there is a paradise for cats, somewhere, because if there is Yellow deserves to be welcomed there, and I truly believe her brother Black and sister Little One will be there and they will forever enjoy playing together. Who knows, maybe humans are also welcomed there, and I will reunite with Yellow one day, and all the other cats I’ve befriended and missed in my nearly 70 years on Earth.

Yellow was seven years old, not too old for a cat, but a hidden disease was growing inside her: not just kidney problems, but the terrible PKD. The news came as a shock, when after a visit to the hospital, for a minor problem with a leg (she must have fallen on the stairs at home while fooling around with Luna, my younger son’s cat) I felt she was different. She had lost some weight, but with the hot Summer we had been through I was not much worried. She had always been eager to be present at mealtime, even eating from Luna’s plate if there were any leftovers.

Yellow in 2015

The silent killer: polycystic kidney disease

With the pandemic behind us, I went for a vet appointment to do some tests, and it was then, end August, we understood that Yellow had serious kidney problems that had not been detected before. An ultrasound revealed the extent of the problem: Yellow had polycystic kidney disease (PKD). While common kidney disease is terrible, polycystic kidney disease or PKD is the most difficult to treat. It’s an inherited condition in cats that causes multiple cysts (pockets of fluid) to form in the kidneys. These cysts are present from birth. Initially they are very small but they grow larger over time and may eventually disrupt kidney function resulting in kidney failure.

Most affected cats will have a normal life until signs of CRF occur. The age this happens is very variable. It is usually over seven years but does happen sometimes to kittens. Yellow was seven years old, exactly the moment the disease reveals itself, and has there were no prior problems of health that justified making tests, we never imagined she was about to enter a new and dramatic stage of her life.

Authors suggest that “considering the dreadful implications of polycystic kidney disease, owners should take advantage of the only method known to prevent its occurrence. That is, any cat considered to be a possible carrier of the gene responsible for the disorder — especially a Persian cat — must undergo a test to determine whether or not it is indeed harboring the responsible gene. If it turns out that the cat is in fact carrying the gene, it must not be allowed to breed.”

Little One, Black and Yellow are now all on the other side of the rainbow bridge. Brother and sisters reunited and forever playing as only cats do

3 stray cats that have crossed the rainbow bridge

No one told this to the parents of Yellow and her brother Black and sister Little One, stray cats picked from the street by my son Miguel. So, suddenly last August, I was told my cat was dying and the initial prognosis was… two weeks. The ultrasound revealed two big tennis balls where her kidneys should be, and I was told “it’s not your fault, just take her home and give her all she wants because the end is near”.

I started reading everything about PKD, searched for guidance in Facebook groups — yes, there is people out there willing to help — visited websites that are a reference in terms of kidney disease in cats. Tried some of the “miracle drugs” — beware of Amazon products -, but no miracle seemed to help Yellow, as I saw her stop eating as she used to, and beginning to lose interest in playing with things as simple as a piece of freshly cooked pasta that she would throw in the air over and over. My dear pet was showing signs of the disease at rapid rate. It was frightening.

We’re on December 26, 2022, and finally my dear Yellow has crossed the rainbow bridge, with the help of veterinarians at AlcabidecheVet (yes, in Portugal). I appreciate all they did for my little friend as we tried to keep her alive, and what they did in the last moments we shared with her. It made no longer sense to keep her on this side of the portal, so we helped her across. It’s empty here at home now, as I write this, so empty that even Luna, who was never friends with Yellow, just tolerating the younger and always willing to play cat, seems to have lost her bearings. She goes around smelling things and she feels something has changed.

Yellow sleeping on my table top studio during a shooting session in July 2016

A veterinary nurse and a country hospital

Yellow lived four months and not just the initial “two weeks” prognostic from early September, and even survived the prognostic on October 12, when I was told “take her home and give her all she wants, we can’t do more for her”. We fought as much as we could to keep her living with some quality of life, and a veterinary nurse started to come here at home to give Yellow subcutaneous (sub-Q) injections and Cerenia, to help with her nausea, so she would eat. Many other drugs, from Pronefra to Ipakitin, were also used these last months.

Veterinary nurses are compassionate, highly motivated paraprofessionals dedicated to animal health care and the veterinary nurse that came to help with Yellow was all that and more. The world is small, and it was a neighbor who suggested her, as someone that could help giving sub-Q to Yellow. In the end this apparent stranger had studied in the same school as my two sons and knew my older one well, because of his passion for magic tricks.

Yellow in a Cinemagraph for one article I wrote and photographed for Manfrotto in 2017

Her willingness to help, her suggestions helped to keep Yellow alive a little longer. Following our daily conversations, a friendship grew that will live beyond this sad experience. It was through her that we visited AlcabidecheVet, which feels like a place to keep under your radar if you are in Portugal, around Sintra, Cascais, and need help with your pets. Everybody seemed so friendly at this little country hospital for animals.

Christmas is not an important date for me, but somehow it was important to have Yellow around for this date, and we spent the 24 and 25 together, just the two of us, as I didn’t want to go out for a family gathering and leave her alone. She was growing weaker and the last days she would get tired very easily. Not eating much had taken its toll and nothing seemed to help, so I was preparing for what I knew was coming. Hope was still there, I believe we always keep waiting for a miracle, but there was no miracle available, so on the 25 I decided it was time for Yellow to cross the rainbow bridge.

Yellow on her first day with us, on September 9, 2015

This is the end, my dear friend…

Yellow is now gone, and my working room is empty. No more cat paw to rest over the keyboard while I try to write a text, no more cat tail moving across the desk and touching my hands while I travel through the galaxy, using Virtual Reality, in Elite: Dangerous. It’s the end of a cycle, as only Luna is now with us. But my cat, my dear Yellow, she has moved elsewhere, and life will never be the same. She gave me fantastic seven years of her presence, a cat that everybody said was sweet, friendly, unique. Maybe she was not different from other cats, but she was my companion cat, my friend.

I miss her and the pain will stay with me for a long time.

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Jose Antunes
Cat Respect

I am a writer and photographer based on the West coast of continental Europe, a place to see the Sun die on the Sea, every day.